All of the coaches and some officials gathered together to make a plan. They said that if the women were not able to be used as test jumpers, their boys were not going to be used either. A protest in a way that would make FIS squirm . If they had no test jumpers for their World Cup, they wouldn’t be able to have it. The coaches and officials said the women had qualified outright for these positions, and we were going to be used as any normal test jumper. Of course FIS has their own special plan for us with that answer. They said all could jump the next day, even the ones without the penis. Wow, what a concept huh? I knew exactly what they were going to do here. FIS would let us jump, but from such low speed you can’t even break the knoll. They made it so nobody could jump far, so their stars could shine the next day.
On Friday when we got to the hill again and got our bibs people were excited, but in a different way this time. We knew that FIS had its own plans for us. I was still excited to fly, since I hadn’t been in 5 years. When we got to the top I wasn’t surprised to see where the gate was placed. The speed was set so low that we had little or no chance to jump far. Ya, you can jump, but you will look dumb and embarrass yourself. How typical of FIS, just what they wanted. I jumped, and I jumped really short. Short enough that I didn’t even get to feel the hill. I had wished big doors opened and swallowed me as I came into land to save myself some embarrassment. This day I was able to do this twice in, which left such a bitter taste in my mouth about the state of women’s Ski Jumping. I feel my place, and I feel unwanted from FIS. Anettte Sagen had a really good jump and made it on the hill a bit, to 177m, so at least that showed we can jump far, but had it been the same conditions as the day before. Many of the women we capable of jumping over 200m. Wouldn’t want that FIS, women can jump over 200 too. After these two jumps I sat at the bottom for a while thinking about what more could have been done on my end, and I can’t do anything. If I get fired up at FIS, I will just see other repercussions later in a another situation. As an athlete you can only do so much before it comes back around to bite you in the ass. FIS has us caged in. If we didn’t jump then we look scared, and if we do jump we just look ridiculous. Who wins here? We won a little by getting off the hill when they said no, but we were not able to show them what we can do. FIS won more here, because they can show that we jumped short, and made us feel like idiots.
Overall the women are angry and stuck. Still stuck, and angry as usual. Every chance they give us they can take it away immediately, and have it swing in their favor. It is sad for our sport that needs to move forward. The governing body that is suppose to support this moving forward is stepping on our toes, and is giving us no wiggle room. It is all done to how they have planned it, and we are stuck in the middle. Damned if we do and damned if we don’t. It is very tiresome dealing with this. I am at the front of the sport pushing for these opportunities, and trying to make things happen. It is going so maddening slow. I feel the level of the women is high enough for better opportunities, but we cannot show them. Trying to push this sport is draining. We push so hard for nothing. We have to fight so hard for every little chance we have, and there are very few.
What can we do at this point? Hmm? That is the question. I suppose we have to keep going at a snails pace, and keep fighting, or nobody will. That is what they want for us. To all give up and move on, but that’s not going to happen. People will be fighting back harder than ever, and they better watch out, because we are not giving up.